100 Ultimate Long Songs (A List by CNanda) part 6

Geez, this list has been going on for six years! Six fucking years and I still haven't manage to wrap it up. Ok, so for part six, here's another 10 songs that I think represent what's called "Ultimate Love Songs"

51. Fix You by Coldplay
Best part: "But high up above or down below, when you are too in love to let it show
Oh, but if you never try you'll never know just what you're worth"

Why I love it: I can't believe that I haven't put this song on the list before. This song might be the millennials' ultimate love song. The lyric is pure love and sincere. Good job, Chris Martin (even though, you're not together anymore with Gwyneth).

52. Make You Feel My Love by Bob Dylan / Adele
Best part: "I could make you happy, make your dreams come true
There's nothing that I wouldn't do, go to the end of this earth for you to make you feel my love"

Why I love it: Seriously, I ashamed of myself that I haven't put this song before too. This song is always kinda make me want to cry every time I hear it. Just the kind of song that stuck in your heart because if you know if you find your half-self that you also gonna do anything to make your love felt.

53. The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra
Best part: "Some day, when I'm awfully low, when the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you and the way you look tonight"

Why I love it: It's classic and romantic. You can't go wrong with Sinatra's song :)

54. Can't Help Falling in Love by Elvis Presley
Best part: "Take my hand, take my whole life too for I can't help falling in love with you"

Why I love it: It's very romantic and I must admit, a bit poetic. There's a lot good covers for this song too. Recently I've been listening the Kina Grannis's version. Her voice makes this song so vulnerable, just like when you're in love, right?

55. My Girl by The Temptations
Best part: "I've got so much honey the bees envy me
I've got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees"

Why I love it: It's classic and makes me wanna dance, or at least tap my feet and sing along every time I hear this song

56. There is the Light that Never Goes Out by The Smith
Best part: "And if a double-decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die"

Why I love it: Well, it's hard not to like any song that Morrissey sings, but this song particularly fits to be called ultimate love songs. It's like when you finally met your special one and it feels like home, so if you're dying right now and it's with your significant one, maybe it's a privilege. Well, maybe. Anyhoo, I love this song.

57. Halo by Beyonce
Best part: "It's like I've been awakened, every rule I had you break it
It's the risk that I'm taking"

Why I love it: ALL HAIL QUEEN BEY! But this particular song is so lovely, so sincerely in love.

58. There's Nothing Holding Me Back by Shawn Mendes
Best part: "Oh, I've been shaking, I love it when you go crazy
You take all my inhibitions"

Why I love it: Ok, maybe I stretch it a bit to put this song into ultimate love song category, but I like the song and the melody and I think the song represents young love; crazy, sweet and rhythmic.

59. Heartbeat by Tahiti 80
Best part: "Can you feel my heartbeat when I'm close to you?"

Why I love it: I always like this song. I think this song is sweet and catchy and have the butterfly in the stomach kinda feeling.

60. Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by Landon Pigg
Best part: "I think that possible, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes there's a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you"

Why I love it: It's a sweet loving song for your crush. I love it.

Were you born to resist or to be abused?

"Are you gone and onto someone new?

I needed somewhere to hang my head without your noose.

You gave me something that I didn't have but had no use.

I was to weak to give in, too strong to lose.

My heart is under arrest again but I break loose.

My head is giving me life or death but I can't choose

I swear I'll never give in, I REFUSE

Has someone taken your faith?

It's real, the pain you feel, the life, the love

You die to heal

The hope that starts the broken hearts"

Here's to you, who break away from all the things that confine you.

(Dave Grohl, 2005)

Cheers,

-C.

Perfectly Lonely

When this song came in 2009, I instantly love this song. I felt like John Mayer perfectly captured what I was feeling back then. A little information about me around that time: I was recently single after a year and half (of toxic -but back then I didn't realize it was toxic) relationship.
Wait...
What year was I broke up with what's-his-name? 2008 or 2009? I'm not even sure anymore since it was long time ago.
Anyhoo, during that time (2009) I was single and felt awesome about it. Well, I'm still single now and until recently I still feel super awesome about being alone. Being a sole traveler in life, free to make any decision based on what I like and what I want.

Nothing to do

Nowhere to be

A simple little kind of free

Nothing to do

No one but me

And that's all I need

I'm perfectly lonely

What kind of independent woman doesn't like the sound of that lyric, right?

Well, I was wrong. Now I understand it was completely and utterly wrong.

There's no such thing as perfectly lonely. Yeah, for a day, a week or any short period being totally alone is "perfect" or "awesome" but later, it is just alone and being alone it the saddest and blackest feeling I ever feel in my entire life.

Sure, I felt great during 2009 until 2015 because little I know that I was still in my little bubble of comfort. I was still living with my family, I can reach and meet my friends at any time any day. Back then, when I was still like that, of course I was saying "I'm perfectly lonely".

2015 is the year I left all of that. I got a scholarship in Denmark and go here. With naiveté of young adult who never left home, I embark the loneliest journey I ever feel.

The weather is lots colder, the people are strangers, the language is an alien.

Now that I now what being lonely is about.

That "nothing to do" lyric seems like lost its power. Now, after I'm completely here and feel alone, that lyric sounds like frightening reality of what's my life has been lately. Being perfectly lonely is the worst.

Maybe that's why I'm feeling sad now after last night you told me to end (again) whatever the fuck we're doing since one and half year ago. I'm sad, not because you're not choosing to me, not because I love you and you're not loving me back. In fact, I do not love you, I truly do not love you. I just know now that I enjoy being with you because I'm lonely here and being with you makes me forget that I'm lonely. Basically, it's not about you, physically and emotionally. It's about me, emotionally.

There's no tear this time. Not like the last time (which is happened around the same time period last year, funny huh?). When we're started again whichever the fuck we did, last November, I perfectly knew this time the end result is you leaving me again and I'm totally fine and accept that.

However, I'm surprise with this sadness. After I look my friend's instagram picture which captioned "I'm fine with being alone" I realize what this sadness is about. I'm sad because I was lonely before then you came around and I don't feel too lonely but then I'm back being lonely again.

Sure I can turn it around and sing the Perfectly Lonely lyric with its old powerful meaning but I know it will mean nothing because now because I know what it feels to be truly lonely.

Of course I can be like my friend and saying I'm fine with being alone but I know it is utter bullshit. I don't want to lie anymore for the sake of independency or whatever: I hate being alone.

So, to my dear friend R, if you truly feel like you're fine with being alone, kudos to you! I'm glad :) But if not, do not lie in words and talk to someone, or ME (:)) about your loneliness. Then maybe we can turn our loneliness into happiness because there's no greater feeling than you know you're not and never alone in this life.

xoxo,

-C.

Velkommen til Aarhus

It's almost three weeks since I got here. For those of you who doesn't know, I'm living at Aarhus, Denmark now :)
In May I got my acceptance letter and scholarship offering at Aarhus University in International Business Communications in Corporate Communication, Master Programme. So yeah, I'm finally on a right track on my five-year plan.

So far it's been so fucking great! I arrived on Tuesday, August 18th and move to my dorm, Vilhelm Kiers Kollegiet at Aarhus V and for that I feel blessed. It's because my neighbourhood is simply nice, safe and green :) I heard a lot of newcomer students are getting place at Brabrand and they said it's not that nice.
The people? Oh. My. God! my friends on my floor are simply AWESOME. Mostly Danish but I have seven international students and they're so nice and friendly and I feel at home immediately.
My classmates are also nice, not instantly "clique" like my friends from my dorm but still very nice and friendly.

The city? Aarhus is simply beautiful. It's different from Jakarta because it's so small compared to Jakarta but everything seems and looks nice and I feel there's always something new around the corner :)

Aside from awesome things that I mentioned before, I'm still at overwhelmed-and-dazzled phase. Everything's new to me and a bit confusing. This is my first time being alone and far from home thus I can't be a spoiled brat that I used to be ;p because I need to do everything and survive here by myself.
So far, the most difficult thing is to adapt with the way they're studying here. I really need to change my usual way of thinking and start doing critical analysis of everything in my study. I also need to read long lists of books that help me with my study and try my best to really understand it.
And.... I'm seriously miss talking with someone using Bahasa Indonesia. Sumpaah yaaaa, kangen banget banget ngegosip dan ngecengin orang pake Bahasa Indonesia :(

However, there's always ups and downs in every phase in your life, I know it and I'm currently at best to survive it.

That's it. That's the news I wanna share with you.
Have a nice weekend guys :)

CARPE-FUCKING-DIEM!

cheers,
-c.

100 ULTIMATE LOVE SONGS (A LIST BY CITRA P. NANDA)


It's been a looooong time, I know. So, without further ado... here's the list, part, I dunno, I can't even remember anymore ;p.


41. XO by Beyonce / John Mayer
best part: In the darkest night hour, I'll search through the crowd.
Your face is all that I see, I'll give you everything.. Baby love me lights out.

Why am I loving it: I think this song is Beyonce's best love song ever. It's very simple, very adorable, it's giving me joy and affection. To be honest, I love John Mayer's version more. If this song is already great with Bee sings it, then John Mayer makes it the ultimate love song. I LOVE IT.

42. I Follow River by Lykke Li
Best part: I, I follow, I follow you deep sea, baby, I follow you
I, I follow, I follow you dark doom, honey, I follow you

Why am I loving it: It's a very catchy song. Just listen the Magician remix and you'll find yourself sing along with it. Then, you realise that this song is very loving and beautiful.

43. Sugar by Maroon 5
Best part: My broken pieces, you pick 'em up
Don't leave me hanging, hanging, come get me some.

Why am I loving it: Perhaps because the video. It's just sweet. If Maroon 5 were crashing my wedding, I can't promise to be a good bride ;) though, it's basically same tune as Maroon 5 always singing. Still catchy and sweet.

44. Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran
Best part: So honey now, take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of thousands stars, place your head on my beating heart
and thinking out loud, maybe we found love right where we are.

Why am I loving it: You can't pass 2014 without hearing this song in every radio station, every music channel, every store, etc. But it was justified. The song is freaking romantic, cheesy but you'll admit it so lovely. Good job, Sheeran.

45. Magic by Coldplay
Best part: And if you were to ask me, after all we've been through
Still believe in magic? Yes I do.

Why am I loving it: Coldplay has their share in romantic song, it's a common knowledge. But I kinda have an emotional connection when listening to this song. It's so hopeful and very lovely because love is kinda like magic, don't you think? ;)

46. Safe and Sound by Capital Cities
Best part: You could be my luck, even if the sky is falling down
I know that we'll be safe and sound.

Why am I loving it: Now many of beat up sounds music are romantic. Love songs are no longer mellow and slow. This song is one of many songs that are proof of that I guess. Dance while you're fall in love :)

47. Rather Be by Clean Bandit feat. Jess Glynne
Best part: I would wait forever, exalted in the sea
But as long as I am with you, my heart continues to beat.

Why am I loving it: "If you gave me a chance, I would take it" so I gave it a chance and turns out this song is so lovely. Very romantic.

48. Latch by Disclosure
Best part: Now I got you in my space, I won't let go of you
Got you shackled in my embrace, I'm latching on to you.

Why am I loving it: 2013/2014 is Disclosure's year. Latch is very catchy, very lovely, very modern love song. One of my favourite.

49. Birthday by Katy Perry
Best part: Boy, when you're with me, I'll give you a taste
Make it like your birthday everyday.

Why am I loving it: I just love the song, I guess. It's a pop song, so you'll sing along just find and the lyric is very playful and lovely, just like Katy herself.

50. Come Alive by Chromeo feat. Toro y Moi
Best part: It's not a lot but all I want to do is skip town on a weekend with you.

Why am I loving it: True modern love song. It's catchy, funky and kinda romantic. Enough to make it to the list. Beside, who doesn't love the video ;)

*not so * Little Thing Called Love

Okay, I know... it's been so long.
Almost a year since I last wrote in this blog.

A lot happened in *almost* a year. I quit my job at Ogilvy to pursue the adventure side of me (baca: mau liburan panjang) and went to Europe for almost 2 month.
I WENT TO ICELAND! ICE-FREAKING-LAND.
The land of fire and ice is super awesome, but I'll explain later in another post, I think.

Now, I'm currently reading a book by Andrew Shaffer. A comedian writer in New York Post. His book; Great Philosophers Who Failed at Love is a compiled short stories of many renowned philosophers in the world, like Albert Camus, Simone du Beauvoir, Peter Abelard, Aristotle, etc, who apparently had something in common, which is failed, miserably, at love.

Shaffer retold the stories on his own witty way and give me a funny point of view, on how these great philosophers suffer their way through love. Well, mostly they were just admit infidelity or just have A LOT of affairs, with both man or woman. *yes, I'm looking at you Beauvoir*

I dunno, I think, for me personally, it just feel nice to know that the great minds who shaped our modern way of thinking of everything that matter in life, were in fact, also failed in this mystery called love.

There were also a lot of quote from this philosophers. I'm still on Auguste Comte chapter, but I found these few beautiful and thoughtful quotes;

"Blessed are the hearts that can be bend; they shalt never be broken." - Albert Camus.

I just think that was beautiful and very well said.

another one came from Nicolas Chamfort:

"The world either breaks or hardens the heart."

I dunno, well, I'm not expert on love nor wise because literally: the word "philosophy" comes from the ancient Greek word philosophia, a composite of philein ("to love") and sophia ("wisdom)) - taken from the footnote number 1 on the book. However, I just think that Chamfort is very black-and-white person regarding love matter. Well, maybe because he used to be "Hercules" in bed- *seriously, at once I though Shaffer was kidding, but then I google it and it was true about Chamfort's famous stamina in bedroom, hence the name* -then he got some *venereal* disease that, I quote from the book, "disfigured his genitals". Well, ladies and gentlemen, true story from hero to zero, no wonder the way he was thinking was very black and white.

For that, I kinda disagree. I still believe, that somewhere, a bunch of people who have their hearts broken into million pieces can still hopelessly looking and believing in a thing called love without being cold or have their hearts harden. Because without it, I think we'll become robots, without warmly heart just pure cold logic... and I think I don't like that.











OR MAYBE I DO!
I mean ROBOT! are you kidding me????!!
Robot is awesome!

Look at Arnold Schwarzenegger. The only time he was cool *at least to me* is when he was in Terminator.

Hasta la vista, bitches,

-c.

Freud-freaking-ian

You know what they said about the first step to deal with your problem is admit that you've got a problem?

Well...

I think I have a problem.

The problem is I don't know what my problem is.

or maybe after three months since my 25 birthday, quarter-life crisis finally hit me.

Here I am, have an opportunity that maybe some people dream of, but can't seem to enjoy it.

but I don't even know what kind of opportunity that am talking about. How does even possible?

I don't know what am talking about.

I don't seem to know what I want.

If I don't know what I want, then how can I live my life?

or maybe, I never really lives. I just... existing.

How can a person just exist? Without any meaning or whatsoever?

Oh God... psychology is such a crap.

05/04/14

-c.